||[Jul. 21st, 2007|12:55 pm]
Men are more practical; act by the mind, not the heart when they are in the relationship, they show their love to women through doing things. In contrast, women are more perceptive and sensitive than men. They have very different points of view. Women tend to think more than men do. But they make a good couple. In the real world, it is not easy to find true love; therefore, we should treasure every relationship we have. However, some people do not know how to maintain a good relationship. |
So I have few points to make in improving this relationship so that men and women can enjoy each other better.
From the beginning, a couple has to be realistic to each other. You must not try to turn your partner into something he or she is not. For guys, there is only one Pamela Anderson in the world, and even she has had her implants removed; so give your girl a break and understand that her physical appearance is not going to change overnight. And ladies, Brad Pitt has already been taken, so you have to make do with what your guy is like. You should love each other for what you are. There is more to your partner than what meets the eye.
Secondly, you should always talk thing out. Learn from previous experiences. Couples fight when they do not express their feeling clearly. Therefore, it’s important to learn to express to each other well, so that your partners understand why you are angry, hurt, or happy. When you stop talking each other from the heart, it could be the beginning of the end. Don’t make empty promises when you are in a relationship. Let your partner feel important and don't disappoint them. It is really terrible when someone promises to take you to dinner, and then calls to cancel it. Don't make promises you cannot keep. If your partner starts to feel that he/she is not important enough to you, you may just lose him/her. You should always stay committed to each other.
In addition, I think couples should have some common things they do together. If not, they should make an effort to do things together. I believe through those activities, you can understand each other better and it will help prevent misunderstandings in the future. You can do some sports or watch a musical; something which both of you are interested in. It could be as simple as strolling hand-in-hand down some shopping malls. When you are in a relationship, you have to show your love. There are thousands of ways to show your love; buy her flowers or candies or perfume every now and then. These may be old fashioned and common but they are good time favorites, even if you have been together for many years. It is wonderful to continue showing someone that you care for him or her.
Respect is the key to develop a relationship. You have to learn to respect each other in your daily lives. So guys, stop making jokes about her hair or skin. And for girls, if your partner has an inferiority complex about his height, stop ogling at tall guys and make him feel worse. Love is about respecting each other's feelings and being sensitive to each other at all times. Sitting on jealousy would destroy a relationship. All of us go through spells of insecurity at the beginning of the relationship but let us not translate that insecurity into jealousy. It is wrong to go through your partner's mail and cupboard and eavesdropping on conversations. Jealousy is like a poison that slowly spreads through the relationship before finally killing it. You have to trust your partner because love is about trusting.
Many couples like to compare their partners with their ex-girlfriends or ex-boyfriends. This would be suicidal for the relationship. Stop bringing up the past. Girls should not bring up the happy memories about their ex-boyfriends; it would just make him jealous or unhappy. And guys should not talk about the happy times that they had with their ex. This would cause the other party to think that you might want to get back with your ex-girlfriend. Whenever you are about to start a new relationship, you must bury the past.
Finally, be honest to your partner. Honesty is not scowling at how awful she looks first thing in the morning, or telling him that he has the biceps of a fly. It means expressing your feelings clearly without being bitingly cruel. When you are hurt, say so, and when you are angry, tell him/her, without getting hysterical. Love is also about honesty and a relationship without honesty probably is not worth it because it is not the true love.
In conclusion, I think we have to keep the above points in mind to develop any relationships. Love is about sharing. When we are in love, we must treasure the relationship. There is no perfect couple in the world but we can learn and do our best to be one. It is not easy to find love, so once when we do find it, we have to take it seriously and put a lot of effort in nurturing it. Do not throw away the gift and deprive yourself.
2007-08-22 10:30 pm (UTC)
I linked to your post when I wrote about jealousy. Thanks! :)